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March 19th, 2006

01:53 am - Where did our love go? Much time has passed since the most recent of communications with the ambiguous group of people who read this. Apparently, last time I was whining about sociology of religion and my color sync. In respect to the first of these complaints, that class can only be described as "a bitch". It was dreadful and despicable and at midterm I had an F. Luckily, I then took the midterm, a final, did the presentation, and wrote a paper which brought my F of a quiz average back up to a B-. Miracles do happen! In respect to the color sync, it was a successful shoot and at this point editing has been completed and the dvd has been shipped for my approval for distribution. The reason I stopped writing on here is because it's all quite boring...or complaining. But I need to pass some time here by writing a quick reboot. I've currently got a pretty decent reel full of Taylor, Sam, David, and Amie's color syncs from last semester. We recently wrapped Devra's advanced (my first) and I'm currently in LA shooting Andrea's advanced doc. I haven't dated ever so I guess that hasn't changed. I really dislike ska music, I think it sounds like tonedeaf white boys trying to make mariachi music. I miss kitties. Ok I'm even boring myself... Current Mood: bored

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October 2nd, 2005

06:33 pm - School SUCKS! Forreal now, what good is a degree in the film world? I'm taking a class called sociology of religion but I've failed the quizes like none other. I even did the reading the first week and still failed. Who gives reading quizes beyond high school? So I was thinking of dropping it cuz...I'm going to fail but it's too late to register for anything else. So I'd be part time and down another gen ed. It doesn't even matter to me! My priority is making movies not sociology of religion. And that doesnt even mean my film classes! Film classes are total BULL SHIT! Everything I learn I learn on set and so I ask myself why am I even in school? The only answer is because that's where the movies come from for me to work on. I meet the people in class who get me to make movies. Film school is a social lounge in disguise! Sigh... In the meantime I'm wrackin my brain making my own movie. Got my actors, still waiting on confirmation from a couple. Just gotta finish up some paperwork for permits n shit and throw in a rehersal and we're good to go. Production starts in less than 2 weeks. What a relief. Pre-production sucks! I feel much better when I'm there and I can solve problems as opposed to prevent them from happening. I pre-ordered season 2 of scrubs! YAY! Current Mood: groggy

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September 9th, 2005

02:20 pm - my two lives Last night I had a dream. It was about a bunch a random shit that doesn't really matter except that everyone who was there and everything we were doing was straight up Houston. Whatever it was, I understood that that was where i was. Then I woke up completely surprised that I was in my apartment. It took me a moment to figure out what this place meant to me and what my purpose in being here is. The point is, that I have two lives. They are completely separated and do not overlap one bit. They have nothing to do with one another. When I'm in one the other seems like it was in the distant past even though it was actually like a week ago. It's fucked up! Oh yeah, if you haven't figured it out the two lives are NY and Houston. Then this leads me to my psychological problem. I have no home. There isn't a place I can feel at home at anymore. Sure there's home like the place I sleep and be alone and keep my stuff. But I don't feel like I belong anywhere. I'm not and will never be a New Yorker. I still consider myself a Houstonian but I no longer feel at home there since we've all started growing apart. Another thing is that I long for aspects of my other life when I'm in either of them. In Houston I long for living on my own and not having to fight with my sister in order to go where I please whenever I please. I long for having people to sponatneously go out with me or have sex with me. And I miss the free spirit attitudes. In New York I long for being able to hang out and do nothing but act stupid. I long for relationships that don't branch from working on projects. And I miss affection that New York lacks. I'm insane... I think I may be becoming alcoholic. I took a shot of vodka at work yesterday...Pappasito's woulda thrown me onto the grill for that. I drink more that half the days of the week. I've also learned to enjoy beer. But for some reason I only really like Mexican beers. As Sam would say "It's cuz ur mexican!" Which reminds me, I'm learning more Spanish from my chefs at Pane e Cioccolato. Well more than "mas frijoles para la ligna por favor!" My movie's coming along. I feel like I'm alot more prepared than damn near everyone. And Josh the producer says we can do it in less than $2000. Since I got $3500 from this summer that's a good thing. As far as shooting goes I've got a couple lined up but I'm hoping for some more. So get the word out! So that's basically my life right now: film, work, alcohol, and musing about strange things. Toodles! Current Mood: artistic

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August 27th, 2005

10:32 pm - The week of "WTF?" So yes, I don't write much. But I prefer to write something people would care to read about. So here goes my week of "WTF?". So for most of the summer I haven't been wantin to deal with sex in Texas. Sex in Texas is complicated and I don't care to explain it more than that. But my inflamed sex drive caught up to me and I decided I wanted to get some. Alfonzo's hot and pretty sweet judging from my limited encounters. But I still think one of the managers at Little Pappasito's is the most adorable thing I've spoken to in this city. But obviously that wasn't going to happen. Anyway so Joel was encouraging me n shit with the whole Alfonzo deal and finally I managed to get through to him that I wanna meet up. THUS BEGINS THE WEEK OF WTF: He was supposed to come in Friday and Saturday and we'd get together. I get a call Friday in the middle of the night sayin he ain't comin. (WTF) So Nadia and I make plans to do something Tuesday and go to Splashtown on Friday. She doesn't show up on Tuesday but with a legitimate excuse but still...I just got stood up twice. (WTF) Wednesday rolls along and I take Efrain to go get a job at Pappasito's. We eat lunch and he tells me that Alfonzo's had a girlfriend all along and Joel has something against me and was hoping that Alfonzo would reject me real bad. What does Joel have against me? How low is that to encourage me while hoping that I'll get turned down? Alfonzo has a gf? Did he also have no intention of getting with me cuz of Joel? (double WTF) Friday comes along and Nadia cancels Splashtown. (a very defeated WTF) Friday night there was a party for me thrown by the Pappasito's people. It was sweet and good and ends with a story I can't tell other than the end...(WTF) So that's that. All's well that ends well though. Alfonzo doesn't have a girlfriend which we know thanks to my confrontational self. Nadia hung out with me today and we had a blast. And I guess time will heal the rest. That last bit is still in limbo and I'm itchin to figure it out. Guess you wouldn't have a clue what that means. But that's enough for now. Current Mood: drained

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July 21st, 2005

05:03 pm - Whoop-di-doo! So in the past few...weeks? I've continued to work lovely long hours at little pappasito's and agonize over what to do in my spare time. Harry Potter: got it, read it, enjoyed it. If you don't want to know what happens don't read the rest of this paragraph! So I'm sure most people were shocked and appauled that the old guy died. But honestly, he had to die before the 7th book. In the 7th book, Harry will have to defeat Voldemort on his own without the help of the old man. And personally, I still don't think Snape is evil. Dumbledore begged Snape for mercy, Dumbledore would not have done that unless there were 4 death eaters watching him. Dumbledore's death was known to him beforehand and expected. Snape is still on Dumbledore's side no matter what everyone else says. One very OBVIOUS indication is that he was "the half blood prince". A true death eater would not have wanted that title. In the order of which books I like the best, this one is 3rd. Book 3, Book 4, Book 6, Book 1, Book 5, Book 2. The reason I didn't like book 5 is cuz harry was a dumb ass in it, fortnuately a good deal of that dissipated here but some remnants still lingered. Color Sync: I've started worrying about it again thankfully. Forgetting about it was ok for a while but only for a while. I got the money thankfully, $2200 at the moment and seeing as how my goal was $2500 and I still have over a month left, I'll manage it. Today Jeffrey Max (the star Viking extra) sent me an opportunity to work on a documentary on a naval base for 3 months. That sounded damn awsome (no not JUST because the reason they wanted me is cuz no more male lodging was available which implied that alot of men were there) to me but since it overlapped my color sync semester, it was a no go. I think I have a good idea of locations and stuff so I'm feeling things are going well in the pre-pre-production stages. Little Pappasito's: the racist guy doesn't come around anymore (I think he went back to Champions). I told them I'd do seasonal employment so I should be going back in the winter. I actually need to find out when I'm leaving this summer. Subletter leaves aug 20 so anytime after that I need to have enough time to find a job before school. I refuse to lifeguard again now that I have experience in other fields (laughs). But aside from all that I make awsome money and thats what I'm there for. Oh yeah and I think one of the manager's is totally adorable which makes things fun, but only in my mind. I hate being 19. The boys: we saw Wedding Crashers last night which was fuckin hilarious. Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson have such hilarious personalities and they mingle so well. I dont fuckin care if they're the same in every movie, they make me laugh as those characters and therefore I like them. No more YMCA rec league so we don't have a regular chilldate but when do I have time anyway. I really wanna hang out more, enough work. MORE PLAY! I miss David, and I'm so horny. Oh yeah and the Kinky people cancelled on me again *grumble grumble*. Current Mood: chipper

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July 6th, 2005

08:15 pm - Strange day this is... So today I finally finished painting my fuckin room! Of course now it smells of paint fumes and I'm hoping to sleep over at Nadia's cuz damn... So who else can say they were on stage with Willy Nelson in front of thousands of people on the 4th of July? I was! It was 110 degrees during the day and I was carrying around a load of a backpack. That part sucked. But after Kinky left (he's quite a restless man), we sat on top of the RV drinking beer and ate steak and watched the likes of Dylan, Los Lonely Boys, and others... I NEVER SAID I DIDN'T LIKE KINKY!!! I said Texas would be undefendable in the sense that I'll never be able to ward off those stupid cowboy jokes. What do I think of Kinky? I really like what he stands for and what he wants to do with the system. I like that he's a human being not a politician. I like that he knows right from wrong. I like the fact that there's an independent out there because it makes people THINK about issues rather than voting straight democrat or straigh republican. I like that we are expected not to care if he's crude or dresses weird. But I do not think he is going to succeed. You can't just walk into Texas politics and completely bypass the system. Everything is SO corrupt that he won't be able to simply get things done. He wants to go around all of these processes and just make things happen which is all good and nice but that is a DICTATORSHIP and our country's constitution(s) are designed to prevent those. Maybe he'd be a good dictator but nonetheless that isn't going to happen. If he sticks to that he will fail. But when it comes down to it, I'd rather have a good guy fail then have another Bush succeed in fucking us over some more. We can't have it all! So what's up with Texas? Before Efrain's party I tried to buy beer and they said only Texas IDs... And then in Ft. Worth they called a manager to check my ID and he stood there sayin "where's the real one?" Luckily I got it back but how lame. New York they accept a note from ur mom if u wanna drink. (not really but you know). Efrain's party btw was pretty sweet. I had a good time and I finally met Efrain's sister. She's so cool! I wanna be her best friend. And I think someone's really lookin out for me in the almighty category cuz a few strange things happened and when I got home I really desperately needed to talk to someone but it was 3am and then Efrain called and we had a good talk. Thank you! Last night I had a crazy ass dream. Ready? Here we go: I was livin in this pretty shitty house though it was pretty big. Sorta a haunted house I guess. And there were a buncha people who lived there too. I will find out later that these people are all my brothers and sisters (there are like 8 of us) and then this man. So I'm exploring like a good little Olivia does and in this closet I find out that the back of it opens into another little closet. So I'm like EVERYONE COME LOOK!!! And everyone's like o big deal its a tiny empty room. Then I notice a latch on the ceiling and im like wtf could that be for. So I fiddle with it and nothing happens and I'm like whatever and sorta hit the ceiling. It pops open and turns out to be a trap door. In the room above the trap door there's another man and an old woman in a wheelchair and they are SHOCKED to see me. Someone pulls me down and then the scary shit happens. The wheelchair lady and her man friend and about half of my siblings are all trying to kill the rest of us. I was running around this huge pillar thing cuz the wheelchair lady was chasing the man who was our friend around it and I didn't wanna be seen by her. She does a trick and turns around and suddenly I'm face to face with her...I shoot some arrows at her (yes I have a bow and arrow) and realize its all a diversion and it's a dumby in the wheelchair. The man she was chasing and I both start screaming and try to find where they're gonna attack us from but he gets shot with about 3 arrows and dies. I run away and see that Eleanor (since she's my real sibling it's only appropriate that she'd be a good guy) has also been shot with arrows and this other little kid has been poisoned. I make a dash for the door when some girl and guy catch me. The oldest sister walks up with a shot glass filled with poison and forces me to drink it (I saw the other person who was poisoned die so I know how to fake it). I stumble around, have a fake seisure and spit out the poison. As I'm twitching the oldest girl pours some acid on my face and I can hear it sizzling but I'm too busy pretending to die to hear it. Finally I "die" and they're all staring at me and I'm like dude i need to blink go away! And so finally they just leave me on the doorstep (I'm outside) and then I get up and run away. I'm now living with this old couple and they've sent me back to school. Somehow I'm alot older and my face has been distorted by the acid so they don't recognize me. I have a friend who still knows who I am and I keep asking her if I've been reported missing yet. But my brother takes a liking for me and really wants me to be his girl. I'm thinking damn ur so nice, why did you kill half my family? I avoid him at first but he's just too taken. He introduces me to his younger sister and she starts asking questions about where I came from and then she pulls out a picture of the whole family and says, see this was my sister and you remind me of her. (the person in the picture doesn't look like the real me so I guess I looked like the real me after the acid treatment). I'm like heh but she doesn't take it any further. Meanwhile I'm thinking I should use the attraction from my brother to infiltrate the family and get my revenge but at the same time I've sorta started liking him too. The real bitch is the oldest sister and I'm really keen on avoiding her cuz I'm SURE she'll know who I am. TO BE CONTINUED... (aka I woke up) Another weird thing happened, I had a dream I got fired and I started sobbing but woke up to find my eyes were crying uncontrollably...crazy. Current Mood: amused

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June 29th, 2005

11:53 pm - and the cat came back... WTF! WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY ME? (please see previous post for the prequel to this one) This time the jack ass came in by himself. He asks what size side salad do we have. You mean the dinner salad? Whatever it is you have what size is it (he makes a few demonstrations with his hands). Yes the second size you pointed out. This one? (he makes the first demonstration). No the one you showed me after that. You and I aren't speaking the same language. (blah blah blah). All I want is a guacamole salad and Nachos with nothing on them. (I'm thinking wtf). He told me he wanted a guacamole salad. So I tell him we have guacamole dip and we have a salad with avocados in it. AVOCADOS ARE GUACAMOLE! We aren't speaking the same language you should get someone here who speaks my language. So I gladly get the manager to deal with him and it turns out all he wanted was a side of guacamole and nachos that I was told to ring up as "see manager". I'm really curious about how that man thinks? I wish I could tap his brain and just listen to how he gets from one place to the next. I'm so amazed. Current Mood: distressed

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June 28th, 2005

07:38 pm - After 3 days of service Waitressing is so fuckin lucrative. In 3 days I made like $250 before wages. Of course this does happen to be because I work between River Oaks and West U. Lots of rich white people. But it does come with its down sides like having achy feet and not a whole lot of time and frustrating moments. yesterday i walked up to a table and gave them their water when one guy, an Indian man, tries to ask me something. his friend, a crusty old white man, interupts by saying "she's not a waitress, she's just giving us water. these people speak limited english". It's amazing how fast our minds work on adrehnaline. Because within a tenth of a second I thought: "What a prick! How can you walk into a Mexican restaurant with that kind of racism? No matter how racist you are how can you assume that any person of Hispanic origin in the state of Texas doesn't speak English? And by the way I'm not even Hispanic! I'm going to tear you apart! No, I'm still new I'll get fired. I'm going to get someone else to wait on you! No, I'm going to give you the worst service ever!" At that point the Indian guy smiled at me, I smiled back. I walked away to fume and then came back to speak LOADS of english to them. However, concerning racism, I think that everyone is a little racist even if they don't admit it. Maybe not racist in that you HATE people based on race but in that you make generalizations about select races. Some recent ones I've heard "White people are stupid", "These people speak limited English", and "Black people are good at basketball". Well here's one I'm learning about "Minorities don't tip." I haven't had enough minorities to support that but here's how it's going so far: minority men DO, minority women DONT. I'm aware enough to know when I've done a good job and when I haven't. And in some cases maybe yes it was justified that I got a $2.30 tip for a $25 meal. But others it most certainly was not. This doesn't mean I'm going to give any less attention to minority women in the future, I'm just saying that generalizations (thought they are often blown way out of proportion) are based in fact. But when I start walking up to tables and immediately say "these ladies aren't going to tip", please tell me off if you aren't at risk of losing your job. I guess I've never cared when someone has assumed I speak Spanish. Somehow it's totally different to assume someone doesn't speak English. BTW Scrubs season 1 is out on DVD. Bought, watched, and enjoyed! Current Mood: enraged

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June 22nd, 2005

01:52 pm - Dear America, according to the state of Texas, I (a 118 lb. woman) am intoxicated after less than 2 drinks...PLEASE! according to the state of Texas, I have alcohol poisoning after 13 drinks...yes I believe them, cuz I seriously felt like I was dying! But I still think the drinking age is crap. You expect we can make sound decisions about who should run our country but we can't make sound judgement about our bodies. They say we can't understand the consequences of drinking. Another thing is that American's are just so up tight about alcohol. Kids say they drank just cuz they wanted to feel what it was like to be drunk. Well parents, why didn't you introduce your kids to alcohol so they wouldn't go and experiement on their own. If they do it under your supervision, you can make sure they don't go crash into trees. After the first 1 or 2 times, they'll be able to understand what happens when they get drunk and not subject themselves to dangerous curiostiy. In conclusion, don't drink and drive (david)! Current Mood: determined

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June 21st, 2005

05:04 pm training sucks... people keep telling me to just get through it and then everything will be fine. well i don't think it's THAT bad. it's not ruining my life or anything. but whatever today I finally got grumpy about it cuz I've been waking up early for 5 days (yeah i know poor me...ha) and then busting my ass to memorize stupid flash cards. 3 more days, then rock on. oh yeah...i forgot to mention what the hell i'm talking about. I GOT A JOB AT LITTLE PAPPASITO'S!!! serving no less. Wow...I really have nothing else to say since my life has been consumed. OH!!! Saw Batman Begins which (sorry Mr. Liang) I think was awsome. I was afraid Katie Holmes would ruin it but I really didn't mind her as it turned out. I had a batman party when I was little. And I have often been equated with cat woman. NONETHELESS It was an excellent beginning. Liam Neeson was a great bad guy btw. He makes for a pretty whimpy good guy (star wars) for whatever reason. Hum...yeah iunno not much else to share. So why do we read blogs and live journals? I heard a rumor that it's to laugh at drama that goes down. Well I guess I believe that of Ms. Wiederseim...who I haven't talked to in a while. But I read em cuz I'm bored and some people write interesting things. So if yours is boring chances are I'm not reading it. Nevermind...so bewildered. Current Mood: blank

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June 14th, 2005

12:07 am - Words just aren't enough Something i think about often enough is how poor our system of communication is. So little can be accurately depicted through words. Our thoughts are translated into a multiple choice odyssey that always leaves things unsatisfied. Now I can hear some of ya'll (Greg, Matt, Q) all saying that's cuz I can't talk blah blah blah. But seriously how can "I miss you" really do justice to that realtiy. When I say it the words fall so empty and I just wanna scream "No you don't understand! I....". Or how bout "I'm sorry". That's the worst one ever. It sounds so hollow in comparisson to what you really mean. Words are just too easy to mean what I really want to mean. There are a few poets and what not who somehow pull it together but in general...humanity loses so much in translation. Current Mood: crushed

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June 12th, 2005

02:35 pm i won't say anything about how she tries as hard as possible to not share the car but then on the few occassions when i tell her I need she gives it to me completely empty so i can roll into gas stations, i won't say anything about her walking around my room when im in the shower, i won't say anything about her always expecting for me to stop whatever i'm doing (even job interviews) if it inconveniences her, i won't say anything about her complaining about bugs whereas she writes in sharpie on the car and covers it in stickers, and i won't say anything about her loud ass bad music disturbing my existence. But I will have my revenge, just you wait. *winks to Efrain*. Barbie is going to be jealous. so i can deal with all the jokes about texas and people making fun of me about being a texan, but what PISSES ME OFF is when people completely change their tone when they hear I'm from Texas and say "like Bush". FUCK YOU ALL!!! what you are saying is no different from some Sri Lankan meeting an American and saying "like Bush", or a white person saying to a black person "like OJ", or saying to a woman "like Cher". Oh yeah and btw, George W. Bush is from Boston. Joes Crab Shack screwed me over. They're like we can't train you for another at least 2 weeks. So now i have to find another job. Advice anyone? I saw Star Wars and was so amazed. Obviously it still needs dialogue help and the such but it was quite impressive. Compared to the last piece of shit, I believed the story as it went along: I believed that they were in love (which i didnt in the 2nd one), I believed that his character turned to the dark side (I was expecting the transition to be uncharacteristic), and all connections were made to the original trilogy. One thing I must complain about however is the immense dependency on computer generated effects. Guess what, they look computer generated. I know it's old school but come on what happened to the puppets that really looked real? Haha I had a dream that I gave my dad a buncha toothbrushes for fathers day (cuz he always gives me toothbrushes for any occassion (the electric kind)). Hmm I had other stuff to say but that's my rantings for now. Current Mood: pissed off

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June 8th, 2005

06:26 pm - Tee hee hee 01. Reply with your name and I will write something about you. 02. I will then tell what song/movie remind me of you. 03. If I were to apply an o'clock to you, it would be... 04. I will try to name a single word that best describes you. 05. I'll tell you the most memorable moment I've had with you. 06. I will tell you what animal you remind me of. 07. I'll then tell you something that I've always wondered about you. 08. Put this in your journal. From David with love: 01. Olivia!!! 02. "Dangerously in Love" by Beyonce because one night when you were over I was skipping over it in iTunes and you freaked and wouldn't stop singing it for the rest of the night. Oh yeah, and this one old song we kept singing in Sight & Sound: Film... I don't remember what it's called, but it was fun. "Closer" because I remember we took it totally different ways and "Spirited Away" because you kinda opened my eyes to whatever-his-name's movies. 03. 4:30 a.m. because you were over and awake at that time and I looked at the clock and was like "Whoa!" 04. Dirty. Yes everyone - Olivia has a dirty little mind and not everyone gets to see it! I'm just that lucky. 05. We were at King's Tavern and were so wasted that we spilled like 4 drinks all over the floor. I think we made out with almost everyone there (including eachother!!) Then we went back to your place and me and you kinda stripped. Oh God that was fun! 06. Obviously a cat. Not only because you love them. 07. I want to know what you're like when you're on a date. I can't really imagine you being bashful or anything... I'd just really love to be a fly on the wall when you're alone with someone else ps: you're super hot Current Mood: dirty

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June 7th, 2005

09:48 pm - Another world I had a dream that I was ACing on something or other. And they needed to do a shot from a boat... While I was waiting for them to set up the boat (cuz obviously the camera was ready cuz I was ACing...) I was chillin with Mikey who I guess had some business being there cuz no one was weirded out by his existence. And I was holding the camera and he was leaning on my sholder (y does that look wrong) and then suddenly someone's like Olivia, lets go. So I'm basically heaved into the boat. And then the boat driver takes off at top speeds and I'm like shit. THEN the moron goes over one of those ramps where the boat will fly in the air. Well the boat went flying in the air and I went flying higher in the air. While I'm in the air the camera snaps off the plate and falls into the water. I frantically try to catch the camera thus drop the plate but fail to catch the camera so everything's now in the water...except me who landed nicely in the boat... So I'm like OMG!!! and grab the camera that is just within my reach (needless to say it's kinda ruined) but for some reason I'm like...the plate isnt ruined, I better save that. So I put on some goggles and go diving for the plate. Meanwhile Mikey is just watching all this amused. So I get to the bottom of this lake or pond or watever the fuck and grab the plate. I look up and see a hammerhead shark swimming towards me. HOLY SHIT!!! I turn around and there's a tiger shark swimming at me. FUCK FUCK FUCK!!! and then I swim for the surface (still holding the plate) and save my own ass as usual. The moral of the story is, if you have me AC for you (provided you get a real boat driver) I will save your tripod plate in most desperate situations... I like ideas that involve creating a whole different world from ours. For example Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Harry Potter, and the books that I am currently reading: The Chronicles of Narnia. Maybe it's from my thirst for exploration. I always wanted to be an explorer but apparently that didnt happen. OBVIOUSLY. I also like the way it forces people to separate natural human qualities from those that woule be imposed by surroundings. What continues to exist in these alternate realities and what does not. But iunno lately its just escape. I do nothing all day presently and when you do nothing all day it leaves you alot of time to think and as i learned from lifeguarding thinking too much is bad. YOU GO CRAZY!!! Nevermind what I think about but it all leads to wanting out! I want my purpose back I hate being idle all the time its so meaningless. I feel frivolous and just...blah. I am looking at people who have fallen into 2 traps: one is being in love with the idea of being in love and the other is rebounding off of drugs. Of course I don't know know this, but it's what I see and conclude. The first keeps falling in love just because he really wants to be in love and though yes maybe these girls are amazing but that's what makes it tricky. Situations are perfect and so he tricks himself into the convenience of it. The second I know has a spirit full of energy and enthusiasm that doesnt match his situation. Why is he there? Because he did way too much to fuel that spirit inappropriately that now he's counteracting that with a safe, passive, sweet, cute, personality-less person. It's just the other way to squash your spirit. I hope that eventually he'll see that boredom isn't the way to get past addictions. Ugh...my mom's trying to make me talk about playing the violin. Current Mood: lonely

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June 5th, 2005

02:13 pm - Live Journal time This is my first live journal post... TEST TEST TEST ok so how do you make links appear? cuz it is NOT working... so it is time to discuss why we are here and no longer at my old location (violivia.blogspot.com since the damn thing won't show my links). well see as many of you may already kno i got a speeding ticket...i attempted to avoid telling the rents but i soon came to discover that they read my blog...and found out about it anyway. SO its time to relocate. however, being the strang one that i am, i don't want my parents to feel left out so i must continue to also post on my blog... sigh!!! WHY must i have a conscience? Anyway, Florida was annoying, I don't like not being able to get away from people. I need escape and I didn't have it there. They wouldnt let me stop playing the violin...grumble grumble. But the beach was cool, very nice beaches in Sarasota. It would be fun in different circumstances. But as it was making fun of my dad was still fun. Joes crab shack is pissing me off. They won't flippin give me a straight answer about ya kno...having a JOB. crappers! David came to visit!!! He left today but we had fun while he was here. We saw Crash which was GREAT so ya'll should go see it. It made me furious, made me cry uncontrolably, and of course smiles all around. We ate James Coney Island hot dogs which David enjoyed thoroughly. We went to the beach which was fun minus the seaweed but whatever. On the way home some guy on the freeway thought that Nadia and I would be turned on if he stuck both his legs out the window...while going 70 mph. Then it was mom's birthday so we went to this restaurant thing which was pretty tasty even though it was in some abandoned corner of downtown. Then we went to Lance's lil get together where David got absolutely WASTED. I did not because my license is on probation and I had to drive (sigh). But it was a good time nonetheless. Then I had to drive to Conroe to drop David off (why the hell did he have to be living in Conroe...its an hour away! try coming to HOUSTON!!!). And on the way back I discovered that nearly every freeway is closed for construction this weekend...great job guys. Yesterday we didn't do much, watched his sister's soccer game, ate sushi, drank jamba juice, and showed his movies to Nadia. But whatever it was great fun. But damn was I tired. ZZZZZZ But now I'm awake and I REALLY wanna see star wars but Nadia wants to have a marathon of the 3 original star wars' before we go see em so I guess i should call and inquire about that. I think it's beginning to sink in that it's not gonna happen... But I don't feel as bad as I usually would because there's nothing I can do about it. And he still makes me smile. But yeah someone tell me how to put links! Current Mood: accomplished

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